The Phone Ransom
Rosslyn: So I did leave my phone at your house, didn't I? Rosslyn: The last place I saw it was my car, and I don't think it's there, and it doesn't seem to be in my bag... Me: *modified voice* If you wish to see your phone again... Rosslyn: Noo Rosslyn: Nooooooooo Me: There must be payment. Rosslyn: Of what? Me: We must have at least 50 quid of kitkats. Me: Delivered in small, nondescript envelopes at the corner of [redacted]. Rosslyn: But it's nearly Sunday! Me: The phone cannot wait. You have one hour. Rosslyn: I have no kitkats. I cannot go buy kitkats. And quid is short from British Pounds Sterling, which I may have but not fifty. Rosslyn: I think I have forty. Me: Or the phone gets it. *ksshhhhht end transmission* ETA: She got her phone. No kitkats. Fooey. Crime doesn't pay.